Blogging and other things

I am sort of new to blogging, but not really. See, I have been writing stuff and posting it to the internet for many years, usually privately and usually not seen by many other people. I have started this blog with some older writings that I thought were pretty good. I mostly write when I am in love or heart broken, today I am in love.
Occasionally, I write satire, or just a good essay on some subject that interests me. I think I will start publishing all this random drivel on here, for all of you to see, to critique and to maybe enjoy.

Throughout the older writings one gets the sense that there has been some emotional upheaval, this is true, as one of my most productive writing episodes were the two years after my divorce. I was one heart broken dude back then. Time moves on of course and much has happened since then. A recurring theme in some of the older writing is a longing for someone to love. I no longer need to love somebody, I have healed and become much more healthy regarding such things. My heart has been battered around some in the intervening years but finally I learned that I am ok by myself and I function just fine without being in love with a woman, without being in a relationship, that I am a good person and need not define my success as a man by the love of another.

Still one gets lonesome, and the memory of love still brings a smile in most cases. I dated around quite alot, being selective and enjoying this new found power, this knowledge that I did not have a burning sense of need to be in a relationship at all, so I could afford to be picky.

Not long ago I met someone that has rocked my world, flat out took me by suprise and exploded into my life. I felt like I had known her for years, that we were instant best friends. She takes my breath away, and yes, I love her. Incredible but true, and there is no denying the fact. I smile at the thought of her, and long for her touch when we are apart, I count the moments till we meet again. I worry that something will go wrong, it is all better when next we speak. Yes, the symptoms are all there and I for one am looking forward to a long and happy relationship this time. It is early, but I give this one better than average odds of success. I am old enough to recognize differences, and she is different, the way this feels is different and life is way to short to not take a risk or two.

So as this thing we call a blog evolves into an ongoing project, there will be many posts regarding this remarkable woman that owns my heart. She is amazing and is the spark that awakened my dozing muse.
Enjoy (slf)